QOTD: What Vehicle Can You Not Stand No Matter What?

Matthew Guy
by Matthew Guy

A good many questions that start with the phrase, “Given an unlimited budget … ” tend to focus on what a person would buy with a bottomless pit of money — and why not? It’s fun to fill our imaginary garages with machines made of moonbeams and unobtanium.

Not this time. Right now, I’m here to ask you: what car makes you froth at the mouth? What car offends you worse than a gunnysack full or rotting tuna? What car would you never buy?

We’ve all got one. Whether it’s a specific model or an entire category of vehicles, I am certain everyone passionate about cars has an example of something they really can’t stand.

Me? I can’t ever see myself buying a minivan (apologies to my minivan-owning readers and co-workers). This, of course, makes no logical sense: minivans are large and well-shaped boxes into which one can plug cubic acres of people or stuff. Most of them are powered by decent V6 engines, many of which offer more horsepower than the 5.0-liter Mustangs I coveted in high school. Fuel mileage is reasonable. Maintenance costs are manageable.

They’re packed with technology, too. The Toyota Sienna’s intercom system will let drivers pipe their voice rearward towards young miscreants in the back row. The Honda Odyssey will let owners vacuum Cheerios and Gummi Bears from between the seats. Chrysler’s Town & Country keeps the young’uns updated on the trip ETA, quelling most are we there yet bleatings. In-flight entertainment abounds. These are all very good things.

Minivans are great vehicles and do a great job of their intended purpose. They are a supremely logical buying decision. And yet … I can’t. Call it being a slave to modern marketing. Call it a matter of pig-headed pandering to my own “image” (or lack thereof). Call it whatever you want. You’ll never find my signature on the bottom of a five-year note that reads “minivan” in the space where the F&I manager fills in the vehicle type.

That’s my never car. What’s yours?

[Image: Clover Autrey/ Flickr ( CC BY 2.0)]

Matthew Guy
Matthew Guy

Matthew buys, sells, fixes, & races cars. As a human index of auto & auction knowledge, he is fond of making money and offering loud opinions.

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  • 415s30 415s30 on Feb 07, 2017

    PT Cruiser

  • Sgeffe Sgeffe on Feb 11, 2017

    L8 to this, but: Kia Soul, Nissan Joke, or anything which looks like it was styled by the designer of the AMC Gremlin. (Fiatsler Pacifica excluded.) Smart cars. Kia Optima.

  • Brendan Duddy soon we'll see lawyers advertising big payout$ after getting injured by a 'rogue' vehicle
  • Zerofoo @VoGhost - The earth is in a 12,000 year long warming cycle. Before that most of North America was covered by a glacier 2 miles thick in some places. Where did that glacier go? Industrial CO2 emissions didn't cause the melt. Climate change frauds have done a masterful job correlating .04% of our atmosphere with a 12,000 year warming trend and then blaming human industrial activity for something that long predates those human activities. Human caused climate change is a lie.
  • Probert They already have hybrids, but these won't ever be them as they are built on the modular E-GMP skateboard.
  • Justin You guys still looking for that sportbak? I just saw one on the Facebook marketplace in Arizona
  • 28-Cars-Later I cannot remember what happens now, but there are whiteblocks in this period which develop a "tick" like sound which indicates they are toast (maybe head gasket?). Ten or so years ago I looked at an '03 or '04 S60 (I forget why) and I brought my Volvo indy along to tell me if it was worth my time - it ticked and that's when I learned this. This XC90 is probably worth about $300 as it sits, not kidding, and it will cost you conservatively $2500 for an engine swap (all the ones I see on car-part.com have north of 130K miles starting at $1,100 and that's not including freight to a shop, shop labor, other internals to do such as timing belt while engine out etc).
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