Pop culture obsessives writing for the pop culture obsessed.

Tim Heidecker proudly proclaims his “cuck” status in new parody anthem

It’s not easy being a social justice warrior in the modern age, when preaching tolerance, racial equality, and the idea that maybe we should give rape victims the benefit of the doubt is liable to get a person labeled as a white-knighting cuckold shill. (Also probably some other stuff, but we don’t feel like trawling through forums on a Friday night to find the new slur of the week.)

Luckily, comedian Tim Heidecker—never afraid to confront the darker aspects of the American psyche—has the perfect anthem for anyone who’s ever been derided by screeching Twitter eggs for the barest expression of human empathy. “I Am A Cuck”—a riff on Simon and Garfunkel’s “I Am A Rock”—proudly proclaims Heidecker’s status, even as it rips into those who don’t “want blacks to live amongst us/And Arabs to have equal rights.” It’s a typically fearless entry from Heidecker, who seems to draw a strange satisfaction from driving awful people to apoplexy by mirroring their terrible behaviors back at them. Also, “I Am A Rock” has a really pretty melody, so it has that going for it.